may include:
- Dizziness
- Mild to severe irritation
- Occasional heart pain
- Elevated blood pressure
- Erections (if over 4 hours seek medical attention - if over 2 hours well done)
- Sleeplessness
- Rash or impulsive behavior
- Increased sensitivity
- Loss or increase of appetite
- Emotional outbursts
- Dry mouth
- Inability to speak or think coherently
*Prolonged exposure may result in dependency or addiction

Down goes the shot
and one
and two
Down goes the floodgate
and out
and up
Go the words I never say to you:
″$!@# THIS!”
“WHY would you do that?!”
“That’s stupid!”
“Ugh, so ugly...why...”
“You should really ___”
Sip goes the bottle
the first
the second
Sip goes the glass
the red
the white
Flag you never hold up otherwise:
″.....mmmk.”
“Whatever.”
“Wha...I said that?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Hmm, let’s just cuddle.”
Round goes the world
again and
again and
Round goes our rounds
again then
again until
We slide into the other side like:
“You’re such a grouch.”
“You’re such a...wimp?”
″!@#$ you.”
“Okay.”
″...”
And we meet in the middle
where your tipsy self
and my topsy self
make the perfect
mixed
drink.

I've done all I can 
Meditation 
Breathing 
Exercise
Nutrition

I've tried, I swear
Clean living 
Cutting back 
Stepping out 
Thinking hard

I've got nothing 
No clue
No ideas
No hope
No excuses

Because it's still beating 

And 

It won't stop
 
For you. 

I love people.
I hate intolerance and injustice.

I love white people.
I hate racism, particularly from long established standpoints of cultural privilege where it is the most harmful.

I love men.
I hate toxic masculinity and patriarchy norms.

I love peacekeepers.
I hate systemic abuses of power from positions of authority.

I love civil servants.
I hate political diatribe, corruption, and empty rhetoric.

I love hard workers.
I hate the notion that one’s work ethic or ability defines their worth as a human being.

I love people of faith.
I hate blind devotion to traditions that cause others harm.

I love businesses.
I hate unfair oligarchies and market practices which favor the few over their fellows.

I love the ignorant.
I hate the belligerent refusal to educate yourself.

I love the educated.
I hate self-righteous bullying over common sense and decency towards others.
------------------------------------------------------------
I may love blindly
But I must hate with precision.
’Lest the things I hate
Turn the things I love
Into perpetrators
Rather than vessels for change

So easy
just to give in
and feel
power
unabated
unchecked
unfettered
flowing through veins like fuel in an engine
a heart
on fire
with no
fucks
doubts
checks
just total certainty
unbound by the chains of day-to-day life
a wolf
in
sheep’s clothing
stalking
grinning
biting
howling
as the herd parts like waves before me
You know
I could
crush
you
consume
you
conquer
the very edges of your lush plains of flesh
my eyes
glowing
like
ember
before my flames burn through your core
my hands
pulling
apart
the pieces of you
one-by-one
...until
You look back at me
with
absolute
trust
And it is I
who fall
shattered.

You suck. 
You're argumentative. 
Fully negative. 
Selfishly attentive. 
A short fuse chasing a spark.

You drive me nuts. 
Like metaphorically. 
Probably actually. 
Maybe literally.
Draining every sane light with your dark.

You got history. 
Lots of neglect.
Not much respect.
Already wrecked. 
Yet you never give up the fight.

Except for the social. 
Honesty brutal. 
Personality duel. 
Resistance futile. 
It's take you or leave you, alright.

You love me.
You don't show it.
Think I know it. 
Afraid to blow it. 
Or too stubborn to give me up.

You still got me.
Little tired. 
Caffeine wired.
Temper fired. 
My kicks to your shins ain't let up.

Those hips though 
really 
slope so smooth
hugging planes 
outlining grooves 

Where lips or fingers
beg to 
touch 

I won’t press hard
or linger 
much 

Those hips though 
really 
hold up fine
over the bed
underneath mine 

Where bodies join 
align 
as one 

Much like our love -
not easy, 
fun

It’s 2 AM 
And I know 
I should send you home 
...but
you live three hours away 
in the mountains
with snow

what if you crashed?
and this became our first
and only date
I can’t risk it 
Nope
Not now 
so...

It’s 2 AM 
And I know 
You shouldn’t stay
...but 
I’ve got a spare futon 
in this room 
out here 

and I swear I can sleep 
alone for another night
it’s only been 
too many 
Nope
It’s okay 
so...

It’s 2 AM 
And I know 
You’ll leave tomorrow 
...but
I don’t have anyplace
I’d rather go 
or be

and if you don’t get up 
right away at dawn 
or if you 
pull me 
Nope
I’m weak 
so...

It’s not 2 AM 
I don’t know
what time it really is
...but
laying here beside you 
with these arms
around me

I honestly don’t care 
about the time 
the day 
or the hour
Nope
I’m where 
I always wanted to be.

Dear Love, 

Please send me: 

a cat lover

short is good

some nice padding  

tanned or darker 

patience is a virtue

as is cooking, too 

my mom’s kinda overbearing

so hopefully they get along 

and ooh - curly hair is cute 

a reader is a must 

someone who likes to listen

and puts up with indecision

maybe someone who enjoys cardio 

so we could workout together 

and has a big family 

like the kind that cooks a lot (emphasis on cooking!) 

but doesn’t want kids necessarily

but gets along with kids of course 

and has a gentle spirit 

that’s happy to laze about with me 

...........

Oh. 

...........

Well, huh. 

This works too. 

Love is work

And I’m a hard worker 

Always have been, baby. 

There are others 

Who’re smarter or faster

Who look better than me 

But I pull 

I do the heavy lifting 

And I won’t buck you off 

You can lead

With all those dreams 

The ones I never bothered with 

You can nag 

It’s not like I’m great

At really listening anyway 

But just know

That I won’t buck 

Or throw you off so easy 

Love is work 

And I’m a hard worker

Always have been, baby